Fuck You, Freddy Krueger

This is a break in my 6 month recap quest and for a very good reason.

Background:

I was engaged in deep conversation with Liam over a beer as has been frequently happening lately and we were discussing some of the finer questions in life such as:

"If you could murder 3 people and get away with it, who would they be?"
"If you could be friends with 5 fictional characters, who would they be?"
etc.

So while talking about these oh deepest of questions, we went off on some random tangent and somehow got on the topic of Freddy Krueger.

Freddy Krueger used to scare the shit out of me when I was a kid. I don't exactly remember why but the cheese grater face and sharp knives probably had something to do with it. I hadn't spend a single iota of time in the past 15 years thinking about him until yesterday and now that I've given him some proper thought at my adult age, I've decided that Freddy Krueger is a dick.

Who the fuck attacks people after they go to sleep? That's a real bitch move. I come home from a long day at work, spend a few short moments entertaining myself, and as soon as I go to sleep, BAM!, some fuck with scissor fingers and a Dennis the Menace adult size sweater pops out and kills me. I can't even get a little REM sleep? Really? You, my friend, are a dick. Grow some balls and try to kill me when I'm awake or better yet, when I'm on my way to work. At least then you helped me out a little.

Conclusion:

Fuck you, Freddy Kreuger.